Your desktop computer, at least. I'll update this later (including credit where credit's due to fabsh) but you can get perhaps the geekiest white noise ever pretty damn easily; basically all you need is SoX.

On Linux

  1. You probably have Sox installed already. If not, a quick apt install sox (or via your package manager of choice) should fix that.
  2. Alright, now in a terminal run play -n -c2 synth whitenoise band -n 100 24 band -n 300 100 gain +10 | play -n -c2 synth whitenoise band -n 100 20 band -n 50 20 gain +25 fade h 1 864000 1

On OSX

  1. You need to grab SoX. For my old iMac that's stuck on 10.6, I needed a slightly older version, but for any quasi-modern release of OSX you should just be able to grab the latest stable release.
  2. Unzip it; I think on OSX that happens automatically if you just click on the zip file?
  3. In a terminal now you can probably just run the following: ./Downloads/sox-14.4.2/play -n -c2 synth whitenoise band -n 100 24 band -n 300 100 gain +10 | \
    ./Downloads/sox-14.4.2/play -n -c2 synth whitenoise band -n 100 20 band -n 50 20 gain +25 fade h 1 864000 1

On Windows

  1. Probably as straightforward as on OSX, but maybe not? I'll test this tomorrow or something and update this post.
  2. Update, Nov. 23: Uhhh yeah so I seem to be failing at figuring out the right incantation; mostly the problem is SoX's ability to figure out the default audio device is apparently stymied by Windows' lack of a default audio device in the same sense that Linux and OSX have. Maybe it'd work if you install it through Cygwin?

And there you have it, the geekiest way to get some white noise yet invented.